Impulse Control…a Really Important Emotional Intelligence Skill

Impulse Control

Emotional Intelligence

You may wonder why I’m writing about Emotional Intelligence rather than Strengths today.

After being led to an understanding of my own Strengths while working with a Strengths Coach, it seemed to me that there had to be more to the human make-up than just strengths alone. It seemed to me that in order to leverage my own Strengths, I would also have to learn how to manage my Weaknesses do they didn't get in the way of my Strengths.  

For many years, as a result of being a technology recruiter, I’ve observed different people’s careers rising and falling.  I’ve always been curious to know why one person rose while their colleague at another company fell.  It wasn't that any of the people I observed lost or gained intelligence.  Their cognitive abilities (IQ) were always high.  My observation was that it was their behavior that got in their way and led to setbacks or sometimes failure.

My research led me to the topic of Emotional Intelligence. I was so intrigued by the topic that I pursued training and certification around the topic so I can now offer this topic as a really important part of my career coaching and leadership coaching services.

Impulse Control

Impulse Control is one of 15 skills measured by the EQi-2.0 Emotional Intelligence Assessment that I use I my coaching practice.  It is an Emotional Intelligence skill that many of my clients struggle with until we work on improving it. The great news here is that Impulse Control can be improved.

Impulse Control is made up of impulses that compel action.  Impulses can be either helpful or harmful to us.  Unfortunately, a lack of Impulse Control can become the source of significant setbacks. 

I’ve been working on the Impulse Control skill with several of my Emotional Intelligence Coaching clients. One client recently sent this to me in an email:

Subject:  Emotional intelligence rocks!

"I was just in a meeting with two “C” level executives. The CTO went off in response to the petty barbs the other “C” level executive was littering the conversation with.  I just sat there and looked concerned and bewildered. EI awesomeness! I was on my very best behavior.  Honestly, I had to draw heavily from the impulse control bank. Just because you think it doesn't mean you have to say it.”

The “C” level executive I’m working with as a coaching client is learning that he can experience success far more often when he listens rather than when he speaks.  He is the smartest person in most rooms he visits by the way.

If you even suspect that Impulse Control is a skill that could be improved upon in your own life, I can help you.


Jeff Snyder’s, Jeff Snyder Coaching Blog, 719.686.8810


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